Finit hic Deo: God ends here...
or wait! Does God really end here?
July is here!
I have written and rewritten several drafts of this letter already. At this point, I guess I am even too tired to write some more.
You must be wondering the reason for my recent ‘long-term’ holiday from writing to you already. In the past few days that marked the end of the first half of the year, I have done the most ‘unimaginable’ act - by forsaking writing totally. I simply lost the courage to give form to these thoughts.
This is going to be the ‘last’ letter for a while; I am taking a break from the world of words. I understand that it is “unserious, unethical, and unprofessional” for me to do but it is what it is.
In that light, I have chosen to write this letter in three parts;
Recently, Substack (the domain which hosts Sagasse Letters) introduced a new feature - the ability to share audio files. So as I shared with a friend recently, I promised myself to share two soul-lifting songs with you. The last few days of the first quarter of the year have been quite challenging but somehow, these songs have particularly comforted me.
I hope you enjoy them
Master, The Tempest is Raging - Mary Ann Baker
1. Master, the tempest is raging!
The billows are tossing high!
The sky is o'ershadowed with blackness,
No shelter or help is nigh;
Carest thou not that we perish?"
How canst thou lie asleep,
When each moment so madly is threat'ning
A grave in the angry deep?Refrain:
The winds and the waves shall obey thy will.
"Peace, be still!"
Whether the wrath of the storm-tossed sea,
Or demons or men, whatever it be,
No water can swallow the ship where lies
the Master of ocean and earth and skies:
They all shall sweetly obey thy will.
"Peace, be still! Peace, be still!"
They all shall sweetly obey thy will.
"Peace, peace, be still!"2. Master, with anguish of spirit
I bow in my grief today;
The depths of my sad heart are troubled,
Oh, waken and save, I pray;
Torrents of sin and of anguish
Sweep o’er my sinking soul!
And I perish! I perish, dear Master:
Oh, hasten and take control.3 Master, the terror is over,
The elements sweetly rest;
Earth’s sun in the calm lake is mirrored,
And heaven’s within my breast.
Linger, O blessed Redeemer,
Leave me alone no more;
And with joy I shall make the blest harbor,
And rest on the blissful shore.
Rescue - Lauren Daigle
You are not hidden
There's never been a moment
You were forgotten
You are not hopeless
Though you have been broken
Your innocence stolenI hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOSI will send out an army to find you
In the middle of the darkest night
It's true, I will rescue youThere is no distance
That cannot be covered
Over and over
You're not defenseless
I'll be your shelter
I'll be your armorI hear you whisper underneath your breath
I hear your SOS, your SOS
I am guessing the title of this letter comes across as a strange one to you. Well, it was an intentional one.
Sometime last month, I was researching for a piece on mental health when I came across a suicide report that had happened some years back. An undergraduate in one of the popular Federal Universities in the country had committed suicide after battling with an undisclosed mental illness for quite a while. His death was a popularized one as he was a well-known budding writer with an amazing prospect. In the course of my research, I had to visit his now immortalized Facebook profile and it was there I first came across the expression;
Finit hic Deo - God ends here!
It was, to be honest, a rude shock to me. Not that it was my first time coming in contact with atheists (or folks who mock the notion of a creating yet not created God), the shock was perhaps from the confident tone of the expression. It did not seek to argue the existence of God. Rather, the expression portrayed the conscious and deliberate assertion of will that alienated God. In other words, to you, God might exist; but when it comes to me when you come to my sphere, God ends.
Preposterous!
At that point, it didn’t make any sense to me why anyone would define himself as such. So I left the thought, finished my piece and moved on. Some weeks ago, I was on the net again; this time, I was searching for other newsletters I could learn from to increase engagements here. I came across two active profiles again. They both had 300+ newsletter subscribers in less than 6 months and were based broadly on mental health in young adults so I sat down to check them out. And surprisingly, Finit hic deo boldly describes these profiles.
God ends here!
Again?
Now, I got curious and set to find out what was happening.
There has been a recent surge in mental health awareness, especially among Gen Zs and Millenials. And somehow, the course of this awakening has sought to provide man with the highly sought-after Freedom. It has now become the rave to reject God because to accept Him is to lose the so-called freedom - the freedom that does as it pleases. Man’s flickering emotions have the central determining factor of life and living, and God must end here.
Interesting but illogical.
Maybe one day, we would have the conversation - that the existence or worship of God does in any way negate our mental health.
For now, I am content to know that it is a choice to reject God; that if these choose to define themselves by their antagonism to God, I can also choose to define my identity by Him.
For me, it is Imago Dei!
I am the Image of God!
You must be wondering why I am taking a break from here. Being here has not been as exciting as I would wish. The whole idea began as a way to share books and knowledge but somehow, I have gotten distracted and disillusioned by the realities of growing.
To write, for me at least, is to think. The whole process of writing is to give life and form to my thoughts. But, somehow, in the last few days, I have decreasingly wanted to bring those thoughts to life.
And as such, writing has ceased. I hope I come your way again very soon; you’d be the very first to read whenever I choose to write again. For now, permit me to close with one of my favourite poems;
A Bend in the Road - by Helen Steiner Rice
Sometimes we come to life's crossroads
And we view what we think is the end.
But God has a much wider vision
And he knows that it's only a bend-
The road will go on and get smoother
And after we've stopped for a rest,
The path that lies hidden beyond us
Is often the path that is best.
So rest and relax and grow stronger,
Let go and let God share your load
And have faith in a brighter tomorrow-
You've just come to a bend in the road
À bientôt